Just an update

Wow what a day! I'm glad I get to go home now. In the morning, I didn't think I was going to make it, I thought I was going to quit on the spot. I felt overwhelmed and underqualified and didn't feel like I wanted or could handle any responsibility beyond a basic mundane task.

Well the day went on and I started to get more engaged. I held an interview that I thought went really well. My boss coached me prior to the interview and I feel like I did 100% better than I would have had he not talked with me. Training can be everything sometime!

Well I stayed busy all day. Today was the first day that I didn't listen to music while at work in WEEKS! Seriously. I was actually engaged enough to not even think about it. And that is good because I was beginning to think I was totally addicted to it and couldn't live without it.

I'm happy to be going home. Moved back in with LH a few weeks ago, but yesterday was the first day I was able to get all of my things moved in. So now I'm all moved in and I need to go home and fold clothes and relax. :)

Things are not ideal, but they are not chaotic as well so I am thankful of that. I feel calmer and more grounded, but there are some things that I'm still not willing to face yet, such as some of my bills. Love life is not exactly as I want it to be (could be a really bad situation from the outide looking in), but I have hope that things will work out for the good (though can't lie and say in the back of my mind I don't think that it will all crumble as usual - and if it does, well then I probably deserve it).

Ok on to other topics.

Yeah, not sure about the Hawaii move, right now it's looking like I'm not going anywhere. I feel a lot of pressure from my boss, like he would die if I up and left him right now. Ohhh the pressure! Not sure what to do about that. Not sure if I should go or stay. Well right now, I need to focus on saving money so that if I do decide to go, I will be in a position to. Since I'm being charged rent now, it cuts into my savings plan.

Well, I'm bored with writing now so I'm leaving to go home.

Sigh

At least I'm still taking my herbs for my mood and my vitamins for my PMS. I should go for a hike tonight, yeah!

Meeks